Super Beauxwl XLIV

6 02 2010

I could not be more excited about the Super Bowl tomorrow.

[Well, perhaps that’s not entirely true… I would be more excited if my Cowboys hadn’t pissed it away and were playing tomorrow.  I would be more excited if I had any confidence in that wanker Tony Romo.  No kind of heart.  And if you don’t have any kind of raw talent or natural intelligence on the field, heart is really want you need to carry you through.  Which is why I am happy, nay, honored even, to shift my Super Bowl XLIV  love to Dem Saints and the members of the mightymighty Who Dat Nation.]

I have selected a black and gold t-shirt to wear; I have my growler of Six Point Sweet Action cooling in the refrigerator and I have my beloved stoner food (White Castle Cheeseburgers, Tostino’s Pizza Rolls, Buffalo Chicken Wings [mmmm… food-like product] and Ben & Jerry’s Vanilla Caramel Fudge ice-cream) in the freezer.

It's like Black & Gold ice-cream.

I am psyched.

And I am not alone… Melissa Harris-Lacewell is jazzed (and Dr. Maddow is on a contact high).

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Mamie Van Doren is a fan.  And so is Joan Jett (she don’t give a damn about their bad reputation).




= Winning combination.

Other than watching a good game (or, when my Cowboys were in the Super Bowl, a game in which my team humiliated their opposition [see: Super Bowl, XXVII, XXVIII, XXX] [We miss you Troy!]) I look forward to watching the commercials.

This year, CBS has done an outstanding job of ruining that for me by running a (deeply offensive) anti-choice commercial featuring Tim Tebow and funded by Focus on the Family.  Not only has CBS made the decision to run this advertisement for limiting choice, they’ve also quite pointedly decided not to run an ad for a gay dating site.

Perhaps CBS actually stands for Complete BullShit.

Anyhoods, choice and two-dudes kissing advocates are all up in arms and are suggesting that we boycott CBS and the Super Bowl.  I say, Dem Saints have come too far to let Tim Tebow and his mama steal their thunder.  Plus, Scott Fujita would be totally pissed.  What I’m going to do is simply change the channel whenever the commercials come on (and I’m going to change to LOGO).

The companies that have paid money to have their spots shown on CBS are hoping to recoup some of that money by converting viewers to consumers.  They are counting on me to watch their commercials on CBS during the Super Bowl and buy their product.  If I don’t watch their commercials they don’t get to me.  Their expensive ploy fails.  I mean, this would work better if millions of viewers boycotted the commercials – then those companies would be super-pissed (at CBS) for not getting the boost that they wanted.  Then they might think twice about paying CBS money to hawk their wares next year.  Then CBS loses.

And, if all goes well, Dem Saints win.


All of these presents and I don’t even have my tree yet.

8 12 2009

Kwannukahmas time is here.

Time for Christmas trees, Unity and awesome menorahs.


The tree in Rockefeller Center is looking fantastic and my prune-dried soul is filling with Seasonal Feelings of goodwill.

I dedicate this tree to a certain Mr. Charles Brown

After-all, it is the time of giving.

And boy, has the Universe provided.

Yesterday, OOMFPAWWIHFOAMFOY, told me about Glenn Beck’s Christmas Sweater.  The “Glen Beck Experience” in which how he recounts how he was an ungrateful, hateful little asshat of a boy and crushed his poor mother’s heart (on Christmas no less) and then she died.  Now he’s telling his story to illustrate his redemption and his faith and to show us, the great man that he’s become.

This story…

Created this man…

Seems about right.

Last night though, my girlfriend, Rachel Maddow, Ph.D. (Doctor Maddow to you), gave me the best gift of the season.  [Wow, that sounds kind of dirty when you re-read it.  Go ahead, re-read it.  I will wait.]

Anyhoods, there was dancing with shades and a disco ball.  There was insightful news making and there was the sheer and utter delight that is Rachel Maddow.  The whole episode is genius.  But what really brought it home for me was the “I guess I’m racist” ad.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Thank you anti-health reform wingnuts for building this beautiful new toy in your workshops of terror.

You should watch Doctor Maddow’s clip for some very incisive commentary from (my other girlfriend who’s not Ana Marie Cox) Professor Melissa Harris-Lacewell.  [Another gift.]

The whole add for your chortling pleasure.

Here’s the thing.  If I was watching the television, as I am want to do, and I looked up and saw a majority of white faces¹ telling me that they were racist, I’d say, “Of course you are.  Now how do I get back to that other channel, I need to see if the Cowboys are going to win this game?”  “Or.  Okay, I hope you’re not interrupting my Fringe with this mess.  Because if you’re interfering in my deep and meaningful relationship with Olivia Dunham we are going to have words.”

What I mean is that I wouldn’t be surprised.  I’d be annoyed that you were using your white-privilege to disturb my sacred TV time to tell me, but… you’re a racist, you obviously don’t care about the wants and desires of little ol’ X-Files missing me.

In words of my very astute friends: If someone tells you about themselves, believe them.
I believe  you racists.





¹And seriously, two black dudes and dude of Asian Pacific Islander decent.  I know it’s hard finding work as an actor and all, but… did you know what you were signing up for?  I mean, we’ve done our share of bad shows/movies/plays what have you.  But seriously?  We have all done things that are going to get us kicked out of our respective clubs.

I’m just saying… Black Dudes… be on the look out for operatives from SCAN.

#1 (and 2 and 3 and 4) Crush.

29 07 2009

I am a woman who enjoys sleeping with women.  So when I have a crush on someone it’s pretty much always a lady.   So, of course, when I was scanning my Daily Beast daily beastdown this morning I was titillated to come across an post about Fantasy Girl Crushes.

I thought, “Sweet!  Another article featuring pictures of Tina Fey and/or Rachel Maddow!  Holy Sweet Jesus, thank you for loving me!”

I clicked on the link and much to my dismay there were very few pictures and very many words.

How you mislead, Doree Shafrir.  You tease!
Instead of pictures of my beloveds there was a very clever article about what ladycrushes are and how they are useful as motivators and inspirational tools.

What I got from the article was another girlfriend (You brought this on yourself, Doree.).  It also got me thinking about my own ladycrushes.

There is, as you know, Rachel Maddow Ph.D., my love for whom is well documented.  But a picture is worth a thousand words so here are five thousand-two words.

Dreamy city.

Dr. Maddow led me to Ana Marie Cox which…  you know, sounds kind of like facebookbefriending all of your friend’s Facebook friends even if you don’t know them simply because you think that your friend is totally awesome.  Except Rachel Maddow, though my love, is not (yet! I’ve got hope) my friend.  And Ana Marie Cox is totally awesome independent of Dr. Maddow and is a redhead which, let’s just say, is a HUGE point in her favor.

I’ve spoken frequently of my love of all things Tina Fey (especially Tina Fey breaks!).

And recently, I’ve become fully girlcrushed out on Professor Melissa Harris-Lacewell, Ph.D. Ya’ll don’t even know.  She’s a Professor!  She’s friends with my favourite Ph.D. holding Rhodes Scholar.  She writes.  She teaches.  She rocks a fierce bob.  The woman is unstoppable!  I am so totally crushed out on her that it’s all that I can do to not make little hearts around her named using the less-than sign and the number three.

So before this turns totally fan-boy creepy (or anymore fan-boy creepy) I thought I’d let you know about why this is more than me just liking attractive women.

All of these women are smart.  And not just smart like me, smarter than me.  The kind of smart that I aspire to.  Smart like, if there were ever a chance for us to be in school together, I would offer to type up their notes and bang them out a sweet-ass bibliography (do kids still do those these days?) for free, smart.  Smart like, if they had their hands raised I would put mine down and just listen, smart.  I lurve that kind of smart.  It gives me goosebumps.

All of these women are articulate.  Enough cannot be said about how awesome I find a woman who can clearly articulate her points.  Articulation is something that I work at every single day.  I am not great at it.  I look up to these women for their ability to distill complex issues down to their kernel and pop that shit out to me like so much heated corn.  <- Do you see what I mean about not being articulate?

All of these women kick pretty much everyone’s ass in predominately male dominate mediums.  They’re like the Xena of each of field they’re in.

All of these women are unapologetically themselves.  They make their living by being unapologetically themselves.  They change the world by being unapologetically themselves.  I can think of no greater height to aspire to.

(And they’re super hot!)

Who’s your girlcrush?